wanting. knowing. doing

This is Colman hamming it up for the camera. He is doing great and having a blast at school. He has been talking more and clearer the past few weeks. Being at school and having his tonsils out have been tremendous stepping blocks for him. He is also having to adjust to the real world without me helping or being there. I am so proud of my kids. Watching them grow up, wanting them to slow down, wishing you could baby them forever but knowing that giving them independence is what they need has been hard for me. I want to protect them forever, but I let go for them, knowing it is what is best.

PreK Pumpkin Patch

He went with his class to the pumpkin patch. You can tell the heighth difference in these pictures.We had fun and he had fun.

coco and stich

I got a call from Co Co's school about 20 minutes after it started last Tuesday. They said not to panic but that Coleman had hit his head, there was a lot of blood and I needed to come get him immediately. Since he could crawl his head has been like a target. He has always had bumps and bruises even glue on his forehead so I wasn't shocked. When I got to the school there was a lot of blood and of course my little warrior was fine. We went to our Pediatrician, who we love and he stitched us up in no time and gave us an antibiotic too because he had a sinus infection too. Well Coleman was so brave he didn't even cry, except when I told him he had to stay home the rest of the day.
Of course I have been watching him like a hawk being more careful than usual. Then today I was on the phone with a friend of mine and I stepped inside for a second to get something and I hear my love bug outside crying. It was "a hurt cry" so I ran to him to find blood all over his mouth. He had gotten on his brothers bike (witch he can't reach) and fell on the concrete head first. What do I do with him? I put his superman t-shirt on him and told him to be more careful with my baby boy. UUUGGGHHHHH.

In & Out

Coleman went to his first day at "big boy "school at T.L.Rodes Elementary. I was so proud of him and his brother in their uniforms. Our Elementary has a preschool in it and CoCo was accepted. Carter started Kindergarten and Coleman preK. The toilets are practically on the ground so he can reach, the water fountains are shorter. He looked at me the first day and said "it's My size." I am so excited for my boys.Coleman was cute as a button in his uniform and backpack, the rules prohibit backpacks with wheels but when we put it on him his feet left the ground so they let him role into school.


Then that same day we had a doctors apt because Coleman's sleep apnea has gotten worse. Its like he can't catch a breath until its too late and he inhales abruptly. It is scary, and exhausting. He is not sleeping and neither am I. I was planning on getting his tonsils out during Thanksgiving break but Dr.Rice said "how about Friday." So Friday we got his tonsils out and he is breathing so much better I'm ashamed I didn't do it earlier.

a pictures worth 1000 words

I was going through some of Coleman's old photos and I was better able to tell he was growing. His legs especially. It is funny how people would say that he was growing or looked taller and I took it as being "nice". I see now that they were not with him daily and could see things I couldn't. I wish I could see the future and know that bullies would not exist for him and self esteem would never be an issue but right now I am just glad he and his brother are here and safe. God made them so special and so perfect that it brings tears to my eyes sometimes. I know now why my parents seemed overprotective, they loved me.
My pastor lost his daughter Jessica over a year ago and he talked about her in his sermon today. I wish she was still here just as her family does but God wanted her with Him. It put my kids struggles in perspective and made me appreciate them more. In II Corinthians 12:9it says "My Grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." I feel like these past few years have been challenging to say the least but God has been consistent, it is I that have struggled. James 1:2 says "Consider it pure joy whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance."

Nana Knew

My sweet Nana died of cancer almost a year ago from this week. She was one of the first people I asked to pray and consider the growth Hormone for CoCo from the beginning. She knew he would get them and had confidence that God was faithful. Let me clarify that Gods faithfulness is constant with or with out Growth Hormones or dying of cancer. God loves me and my family when things are great and all I have needed He has provided but he loves me and is faithful when things do not turn out as I plan also. As Natalie Grant sings " who told us we'd be rescued?, why should we be saved from sorrow...this is how it feels to be held, how it feels when the sacred is torn from our lives and you survive..."
And so I have survived, to miss my Nana and see my Pop change from her loss. I've let dreams of my "perfect" family go and seen new ones form. Today was bitter sweet because with the good news that Coleman is growing, I missed her all over again. Because I felt jipped that she wasn't here to hear my news,selfish I know. I am comforted that maybe she knows CoCo and I are doing great and that her prayers to God were everything to me.
I smiled today in a knowledge that she knew, Nana knew everything would work out. She was always calm when I was panicky or faithful when I was unsure but today my faith in God increases, not because of Coleman growing but because I am growing in Christ.

2 inches in 4 months

Whew hew!! We have good news, The Endocrinologists in Lafayette measured Coleman today and said he had grown two inches since March. That is excellent since an average toddler grows 2 inches in a year. He was 33 1/2 in March and 35 1/2 today(8-6-10). His legs had grown an inch of the two inches which is great since that is where his height is shortest. He had lost a 1 1/2 lbs so we need to keep an eye on that, 30lbs to 28.8lbs so its not much. We are to keep the Neutropin Growth Hormones at .06 until he gains some weight. She had asked if his feet had grown and when I told her they had gone fro a size 5 to 8 in 5 months she was excited.