Saturday, July 17, 2010
what to say
Coleman has been paying more attention lately. When someone asks how old he is and the we get a "oh, he is so little" or something like that and I have noticed him listening to every word spoken. He has been saying things and asking questions about height and age more than normal the past week or so. I know its coming, and I tell him everyone is different. Some are tall,like Carter his brother(extra ordinarily tall) and some are not so tall. Some are blond and some are red headed. But it seems I am talking to someone who is figuring things are different for him, and he is strong. I hope I do a good job making him confident in who he is and not what sets him apart physically but only time will tell. Any suggestions to explain things to a four year old in a life changing way? I wish I knew what to say...
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We have always been honest with Evan, so he doesn't know any different. Since we've known, he's known that his body may not be as big as every body else, but that doesn't matter. However, he is still young (5) and isn't affected quite yet by being different. We still get the comments "he's 5? He's going to be in Kindergarten?" But Evan is just happy being 5, playing with his friends and causing mischief, so we try not to worry about it.
ReplyDeleteThank you Andrea. I talked with him the otherday and we told him he is shorter than everyone else but its hard to see the comprehension set in. He is so tough though. Thanks for your help.
ReplyDeleteWe have been up front with Ashton from the beginning. We never used the word hypochondroplasia because that's useless at such a young age. We told her that God made everyone special, but made her extra special. We explained that she will never be as tall as everyone else, but that she doesn't have to be. She's 8 yrs old now, and she understands. She plays soccer and dances and is very well rounded. She's had a few kids tease her and tell her she's a baby and will never grow up. She told me that a boy told her on the playground that she was short. When I asked her what she said to the boy, she said, "I told him you're tall. So what?" Kids are so amazingly resilient.
ReplyDeleteMy advice would be to keep communication open and expose him to as many different situations as possible. I think that will help him gain confidence in himself and yet understand that God made everyone different.